A Battle Royale

For centuries immemorial, there have multi faceted battles that are getting fought. For independence. For more. For honour. For all.

To me, a day to day battle is the battle against the bulge. This battle is a continuous and ongoing battle. Some times I win. Many times I lose. The times that I win are getting few and far between. But the battle is on. Some years ago, my mother bought me an insurance policy, and the doctor didn’t allow it to go through. ‘Overweight’ he said ! I was shocked. Puzzled. Above all, upset that a pot bellied doc had called me unfit. And denied me an insurance policy ! huh !

As enraged as the Pandavs were, when Draupadi was stripped, I took some serious vows that day. I began walking to office, with a pair of sneakers always on my backpack. Near starvation. Some odd game now and then. Every time I saw a mouth watering sweet in front of me, a visage of the pot bellied doc who called me unfit used to pop up, robbing the sweet of all the allure.

Lo and behold, my waist size started dropping from 40 to 38 to 36. A couple of years passed. Like the Indian who has recently moved to the US, calculating every dollar in rupee terms, I thought of each food item in calorie terms. Life moved on. My weight slipped now and then but stayed ‘manageable’.


I continued being careful about what I ate. Then came one crucial patch, when work overtook my ability to cope with it, I took my eyes off the road. Along came the tyre (you know where)! Coincidentally, that’s exactly when my wife’s culinary skills increased, and the bulge in the belly was back. With a vengeance. All it took was 4-5 months. And I was pushing 38 inches. It didn’t pinch me much money wise though. By now, I had trouser from every brand at every band from 34-40 inches ! It was a lost cause.

Five / six months back, a friend became Vice-President in a healthcare firm and offered a health care check up package at a discount. Being the true Indian who fell for all things at a discount, I went for it. I expected to sail through, for i had been watching what i ate. But then, it turned out that i kept watching what i ate, and kept eating too ! For all the rantings I made about health, it wasn’t a pretty picture.

One more vow. And this time a loud one at that. The battle conches sounded. The war bugles blew.

The tennis racquet got dusted & restrung. The sneakers got a little dirty as I fought the battle with renewed vigour. The muscles ached. The bones creaked. But then, since then, three kgs have disappeared. Having said that, am a little scared to go back to the health care centre again. Don’t know what she’l tell me now.

I remember reading somewhere, “its important to keep the fixed deposits in the bank and the current account in the body”. Well, for me the fixed deposits in the body are increasingly hard to break open. As the sweets are increasingly difficult to stay away from. But the battle is still on.

So, between the sweets and Pani Poories, the tennis and treadmill continue. This is one tough battle all through life !! And am wearing battle fatigues. For now ! Atleast.