Straight from Man’s World. This one was too good. I am married and i know. All men with women know this too. But still, this is important !!

Is that colour really you ?
You must be colour blind if you think that it suits you

Do you really want to see that film?
I don’t want to see that film

I am sure they are nice when you get to know them
I didn’t like them at all

Your friends are ….different.
Your friends are wierdos

You have great potential as a friend.
You are about as sexually interesting as an aardvark

Wheres our relationship going ?
We should get married.

I think we’ve fallen into a rut
I’ve met another hot prospect

You take me for granted
The hot prospect is definitely interested

We’ve grown apart
He’s asked me to marry him

Your really good with children
Lets get married

I don’t need this complication right now
Your don’t do anything for my hormones

What ? Me? Jealous ?
I am jealous but I’ll kick you in the goolies if you suggest it

Tell me the truth: have I gained weight?
Lie to me. Tell me I haven’t gained weight.

No, its nothing.
Iam pissed off but you have to find out why

I am tired but you stay and have fun
You had better come with me right now

Do you want to ask for directions?
I want you to ask for directions

Yes, I am fine.
I am not fine. I am pissed off. You did it.

No, really, I am fine.
I might tell you if you grovel

We need to talk
You are in trouble

Do what you want.
Do what I want you to do

No, you should do what you want
You should do what you want to do but only after you understand that I know what is best for you to do do.

I am not saying a word.
Unless you insist.

No, I don’t want to interfere in you life
Unless you insist

It really doesn’t concern me..
But if you don’t insist o my tell you what I think, youre in deep doodoo

Of course, I am ready
I am ready to start tinkering with my make up

Are you ready?
I’ve been ready for four seconds

Why aren’t you ready ?
Its been five seconds and I am getting impatient

Can we talk?
Its all over but I want to tell you why its your fault that its all over.

I was wrong and I am sorry.
I don’t know if you even know how big a moment this is for you that I have admitted that I was wrong. I wonder if you will give me credit for admitting it. And if you don’t start showing that you can tell what a wonderful moment this is…I shall count it against you forever

Ha ha ha
I have a sense of humour and I am demonstrating it but I do not think its very funny

That bitch Tanya…
My best friend Tanya

You never listen to me
You never listen to me.